The Art of Finding the Right Gift For Someone You Hardly Know (But Have to Buy a Gift For Anyway)

Choosing just the right gift for your kids or you soul mate or your sister is fun. You know what pleases them. The only challenge is deciding what will please them the most . That truly special gift that will produce the largest smile.

Heck, you smile just thinking about their reaction.

Plus it's usually a pretty easy choice. After all, they've told you. In the case of your kids, they've probably told you more than once.

Your soul mate and your sister (or brother or best friend) have certainly dropped enough hints. And anyway, you've known them long enough so that, by now, you know what pleases them just about as well as they know themselves.

Of course, sometimes money will do the trick. Five bucks to the kid at the gas station. Fifty to your apartment Super.

But there are times when only an in-a-box gift-wrapped gift will do. These are the 'got to' gifts that make us heave a sigh of (dare we say this at holiday time?) Annoyance.

Because these are the gifts we're compelled to give to virtual strangers. Like the receptionist whose name we've randomly picked for a gift-exchange at the office Christmas party. The sum total of our interaction has been mutual good-mornings in the elevator.

Or perhaps we've just been informed that Cousin Emma will be bringing her latest beau to the family gathering, and we really can not leave him as the odd-man out in the gift exchanging.

Whatever the reason, we just want to get it over with. At minimum cost.

But would not it be more fun to make choosing such gifts. . . well, more fun? Or at least interesting?

You can, you know. All you have to do is release your Inner Sleuth.

Come on, now. Who does not like a good mystery? Movie. Novel. Game of Clue . For most of us, it's fun to solve things. Makes us feel smart.

So for the Sherlock Holmes hidden away in all of us, go ahead and resolve The Mystery of What the Stranger Wants . Gumshoe. PI. Detective. Sleuth. Pick the title of your choice and get to work.

Next time you see that receptionist, pay attention. What color is she wearing? What kind of jewelry? Instead of just 'good morning,' ask if she's read the latest best-seller. No? Aha! A challenge for you, Sherlock: How to ask what she's interested in without being obvious.

If you have trouble eliciting the desired information, you might engage a college (or two) to help you with the sleuthing so it does not sound like an interrogation. Set up some little scripts. Make it sound like impromptu chats about art today, poetry tomorrow, global warming on Friday morning.

Or try sniffing: what perfume is she wearing?

As for Emma's beau, a little long-distance sleuthing is in order. Emma's mother (or sister or brother brother) may profitably be chatted up on the phone.

Perhaps an e-mail to Emma herself telling her you're just dying for her to tell you about what's-his-name. Gush a little, and you may learn a lot.

But remember: this is an undercover investigation. The payoff comes when the wrapping paper is torn off.

When the receptionist gasps, "August Schildkraut's The Philosophy of Autonomy ! It's perfect! However did you know?"

When Emma's beau can not wait to find a computer so that he can transfer that CD of Lawrence Welk's Favorite Polkas into his iPod.

When everyone's smiling. Yes, Sherlock: even you.









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